(me)

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

churh now

rief History of the United Church of God

The United Church of God, today active with congregations in more than 50 countries, began as a formal assembly in 1995. Doctrinal distinctives of the Church include the observance of the seventh-day Sabbath, a New Testament application of God's Holy Days (which Jesus also kept and which the Church believes are a literal representation of God's plan for humanity) and a firm belief that Jesus Christ will return to earth to institute a benevolent, world-encircling Kingdom of God.
As authoritative historical records clearly show, a number of extra-biblical practices entered the early church within a century after the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Recognizing that fact, the United Church of God strives to directly mirror the beliefs and practices of the first-century teachings of Jesus and the original apostles. This leads the Church to choose not to participate in common worship practices that were added without biblical mandate, including the observance of Christmas and Easter.
Many of the current ministers and members of the United Church of God were once members of the Worldwide Church of God, a nonprofit corporation under the leadership of Herbert W. Armstrong until his death in 1986. A subsequent unwarranted shift toward nonbiblical practices and beliefs led numerous ministers and members to leave the fellowship of that organization.
Concerned with uneven administrative practices of the former assembly, more than 100 ordained ministers developed a new administrative structure that was more directly accountable to members and the ministry. A new 12-person Council of Elders, elected by a general assembly of all ordained ministers in United, was tasked with reviewing and independently documenting all core beliefs and doctrines of the Church, which above all must be true to the biblical record and not reliant on later divisive philosophical and theological traditions that were developed centuries after the original apostles. That task has been largely completed, and the Church's formal Statement of Fundamental Beliefs is published for all to see on our website.
Both biblical and secular history record that Christians in the first century possessed a strong focus on what Jesus described as the "good news" of the coming Kingdom of God.
In its efforts to mirror that first-century Church and its original apostolic focus, the United Church of God fully embraces and teaches the same message that Christ and the apostles taught. Indeed, the open mission of the United Church of God, reflecting the direct commands given by Jesus to His disciples in Matthew:28:19-20 and Mark:16:15, focuses on this dual goal: "preaching the gospel, preparing a people." To achieve this end, the Church publishes a considerable amount of literature explaining and outlining biblical and historic records concerning the plan of salvation and the role of Jesus Christ in that plan. The Bible makes it clear that the ultimate reward of the saved is to enter the Kingdom of God.
However, as the Church encourages and supports its prophetic ministry, it insists that any speculative comments regarding biblical prophecies be labeled as such and not taught as authoritative doctrine. For example, while the prophetic consequences of rejecting God's law are made plain in the biblical record, the timing of when these events will specifically occur is not. As Jesus Himself told the apostles regarding this, "It is not for you to know times or seasons which the Father has put in His own authority" (Acts:1:7). Jesus did instruct those who would follow Him to have a sense of urgency toward overcoming sin through the power of the Holy Spirit and to prepare themselves as if the Kingdom could return at any moment, regardless of when Jesus might actually return to set up the literal Kingdom of God. "Watch therefore, for you do not know what hour your Lord is coming… Therefore you also be ready, for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect" (Matthew:24:42, 44).
United's Council of Elders, which also elects the president of the assembly, oversees the strategic direction and activities of the Church. In its commitment to positive accountability, detailed reports of Council meetings and other relevant information are regularly published on our website. In addition, the Church strongly believes in fiscal accountability, and its financial records are externally audited annually by a qualified independent accounting firm. The unqualified opinions of the accounting audits are freely available online for review.
For more information about the Church, please browse the ucg.org website. General information about the Church's activities is available within the publication This Is the United Church of God, which is available in various electronic formats or in hard copy by request.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

jerusalem

Assembly of Jerusalem

Shalom!
The Assembly of Jerusalem (often referred to in English as the "Church of Jerusalem" or "Jerusalem Church"; abbreviated as "AoJ" in this website) is a worldwide religious community with historical roots to the ancient pre-Christian Essenes of Qumran and is not associated with modern day Christianity or any New Age or new religious groups. The Assembly believes that the historical Yeshua was fully God and fully man and was the Messiah sent by the Father and anointed by the Holy Spirit, who was crucified and rose again according to divine prophecy.

Today the Assembly has small communities in various parts of the world dedicated to living a Torah observant lifestyle in a modern day setting, without compromising God-given truths of the Scriptures, as taught by the historical Yeshua and those whom He appointed as earthly leaders of the Assembly.

THE HOLY SCRIPTURES
The AoJ has her own Scriptures and considers the original Holy Writings, in Hebrew, to be inspired by Holy Spirit. The Assembly believes the Scriptures were originally written in the ancient Hebrew language and translated into Aramaic, Greek and other languages.

ECCLESIASTICAL LEADERSHIP
The Assembly teaches that Yeshua the Messiah appointed the Apostle James the Righteous (Ya'aqub ha'Tzaddik) as the head of the earthly assembly, and it continues in this practice today by appointing, in Apostolic Succession, patriarchs in the same line. The Assembly of Jerusalem's patriarchal governing of the Church is not a papal system. The earthly head of the Assembly is called the "Patriarch", while the secondary head of the Assembly is the "Catholicos". The Patriarch is also referred to as "Catholicos Patriarch" in relation to his responsibilities for the entire earthly Assembly of Believers. The Patriarch of the Assembly resides in a Jewish community known as Pisgat Ze'ev in Jerusalem, Israel. The Assembly has Rabbans and rabbis for various responsibilities in teaching among its membership. The halakhic decisions for the Assembly are governed by an Assembly of seventy elders in Jerusalem, known as the Beit Knushta ("House of the Assembly").

THE NAME OF THE ASSEMBLY
The official and legal name of AoJ has always been "Assembly (or Church) of Jerusalem". There are various communities affiliated with the AoJ that use other names such as "Nasrani", "Nazaraean Orthodox" and various other names. In the past, some members in China have referred to themselves as "Orthodox Nestorians" because of their Christological view which was held by St. Nestorius the patriarch who was unjustly accused of "heresy" by his contemporaries. In India, some converts refer to themselves as "Saint Thomas Christians" (Mar Thoma Christians, Mar Thoma Believers) in a generic sense but without the connotation that they are associated with other communities that are affiliated with various Christian sects or denominations. Those communities that refer to themselves as "Nasrani" use the term with the understanding that this name also means "Essene". The AoJ does not necessarily endorse the various names used by all communities, but permits a variety of names for individual congregations based on their own individual, spiritual development.

MISSIONARY WORK, MEMBERSHIP, FUNDING
As of September 30th, 2007, the Assembly of Jerusalem curtailed its missionary work throughout the world. Individual members are free, and encouraged to share the Scriptures with their neighbors as it is commanded by Messiah. The Assembly publishes its Scriptures in Hebrew, Aramaic, Spanish, English, Portuguese and other languages for distribution among its members. Since the conclusion of the AoJ's missionary work, focus is placed strictly on is current membership. The AoJ does not actively seek to convert individuals to its beliefs or practices. And while the AoJ supports the nation of Israel, it does not seek to convert Jews.

The AoJ considers new members as "gerim" (converts) who must undergo a gradual process of learning in the Scriptures before becoming full members. This usually takes between two and three years depending on the individual. These members of the Assembly are also referred to as "Yeshuans" because of their devotion to Yeshua the Jewish Messiah.

The AoJ's work is funded by members who make voluntary gifts in accordance with the mandates within the Torah and does not solicit financial contributions from non-members. The Assembly has an online store where it makes available translations of the Scriptures and devotional books, often free of charge and at nominal costs.

BASIC DOCTRINAL TEACHINGS OF THE ASSEMBLY OF JERUSALEM

God:
We believe that the presence of God can be found everywhere that there is peace, truth and light. The concept of God should not be limited by childhood indoctrination such as believing that God is in a far away or hard to reach place. God is near all those who call upon Him in every high and low corner of the earth. God is One and He makes Himself known to His people through the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

Yeshua:
We believe that Yeshua is the Son of God and that His demonstration while here on earth is a perfect example for all to follow. We believe that Yeshua was crucified and was resurrected on the third day.

We believe that the Blood of Yeshua on the Cross is redeeming and is a manifestation of God's great love for His creation and that it can lead one to life free of sin. We additionally believe that Yeshua, as the one and only Son of God came to His own Israelite people and reached out to people of various cultures throughout history to deliver His message of love and redemption. As the Son, Yeshua is referred to as the Second Aspect, or Manifestation of the One Godhead. The Apostles, disciples and family members of Messiah called Him by His Aramaic name because that was their language, thus His historically accurate Name is "Yeshua" (pronounced: "ye-shoo-ah"), although some religious organizations refer to Him as "Jesus", which is not the historically accurate Name of our Lord.

Holy Scriptures:
We believe that what is commonly known as the Holy Scriptures, is the greatest of books ever written and that it serves as a guide for humankind. We believe that the record contained in the Scriptures is the message provided to humankind by God to know Him. God can be known in His own beautiful creation as well. There are millions of people that have never read a copy of the Scriptures and we believe that God loves them none the less. We refer to our Holy Book as the "Sefer Shakhynah", or "Book of the Presence".

Faith:
We believe Holy Spirit, being a part of the Godhead, is provided to all who have a heart of understanding and love. Regardless of one's color, gender or social status, God is the God of all peoples and not of just a few. God's love, light and life can be found by anyone willing to walk with Him. This same love was demonstrated by Yeshua 2,000 years ago and He embraces all those who pursue a life filled with love and peace according to His Word. Yeshua said that if we love Him, we must obey His Commandments.

Salvation:
We believe in the divine work of the Cross. All people have the opportunity of being brought into the Light of God through a process of spiritual growth granted to us by our Creator through His undeserved mercy and grace. In other words, we believe that all people will have a chance afforded to them to be reconciled to God through the Sacrifice on the Cross and the subsequent resurrection.

World:
We believe that the world is in a dying state and that our purpose is to bring God's Light to all those who wish to have a better way of life and to be comforted with His hope. It is the desire of the Assembly of Jerusalem to assist all peoples with the message of hope and love without judgment or prejudice. God's message is for all peoples regardless of age, gender, race, etc. Our purpose is to reflect the Divine Love of our Creator and not to judge based on any human criteria. We believe that Holy Spirit will teach those who wish to learn and live according to the Holy Book of God's Word.

More Information

Do orthodox Essenes believe that they alone have salvation?
Frequently Asked Questions/Common Misconceptions

Official Websites:
Patriarchate of Jerusalem


Return to Top of Page

Copyright © 1997-2010 by the Church of Jerusalem.


metacognitive strategies

Clip 1
   Teacher IDENTIFIES the learning objective 
   Clip 2
   Teacher LINKS to student prior knowledge
Clip 3
   Teacher PROVIDES meaning/rationale for learning 
   Clip 4
   Teacher DESCRIBES/introduces Strategy Cue sheets 
   Clip 5
   Teacher describes the ORDER strategy 
   Clip 6
   Teacher models using the ORDER strategy 
Teachers should see themselves as collaborators in the learning process.
Teachers should help students define their learning objectives – both for the whole course and for each day as well.
Teachers should make a point of discovering what strategies their students are learning.
Teachers can suggest strategies for students to try out.
Teachers can help students evaluate which strategies work best for them.
v

 



teaching strategies

At this stage of the tutorial, you have set overarching goals, organized content, and developed a course plan with ideas for how to give students the practice that will make it possible for them to achieve the course goals. In this section of the tutorial, you will make choices about what you will have students do in order to learn the course content and practice the goals. Before presenting a smorgasbord of teaching strategies, this section of the tutorial will explore briefly what is known about how people learn.

Monday, May 2, 2011

STORYAHE JOKES

Boy: Kuha unya ko og driver’s license nimu miss.
Girl: Adto sa LTO ohhh.. nano ari man ka naku?
Boy: Because you’re driving me crazy.
imong sakyanan kay Estoryahee!!!
______________________________________________________
boy: nilaag mn ka pggbie miss noh
gurl: wala mn… nganu d.i
boy: naabot mn ka sa akong damgo gud!…
ESTORYAHEEEE!!!!!
______________________________________________________
boy: miga wa ka kapoya?
girl: ha? wa man ngano?
boy: ganina ra man gud ka nag dagan2x sa akong huna2x
istoryaheeeeeeee
______________________________________________________
boy: miss, ketchup ka ba?
girl: unsa naman pud nga ka kornehan?
Boy: gipangita naman gud ka sa akong hotdog
istoryaheeeeee!!!
______________________________________________________
boy: miss naa ky eraser?
gurl: wla rba, nganu mn?
boy: i erase ta tka sa akong huna2x….
gurl: ESTORYAHEE!!!!!!
______________________________________________________
boy: Is your last name Gillette?
gurl: dli rba… y mn??
boy: Because you’re the best a man can get.
ESTORYAHEE!!!
______________________________________________________
guy: naa kay ball pen??
girl: naa.. (ghtag ang ballpen)
guy: di lagi mu-agi??
girl: mu-agi na oi.. tka rka..
guy: ows?? suwat imu number beh..
ESTORYAHEEEE!!!!
______________________________________________________
guy: day, tudloi gud ko ug pag translate
girl: cg, go
guy: unsay iningles sa gugma
girl: love
guy: sa ghigugma tika
girl: i love you
guy: i love you too.
ESTORYAHEEE!!!!!
______________________________________________________
guy: miss, out-of-school ka?
gurl: huh? nganu ka.ingon man ka ana?
guy: kada adlaw man ka cge tambay sakong huna2 gud…
STORYAHE!!!!!
______________________________________________________
DODONG:day.. snatcher ka saona sah??
INDAY: huh?? dili mn.. y mn??
DODONG: ahwz.. imo man lagi gi snatch akong kasing2..
INDAY: STORYAHEEE!!!
______________________________________________________
babaye, girape:
girl: TABAAAAANG!!!
rapist: ayaw syagit, moundang ko ron!!!
girl: AYAW NA LAAAANNG!!!
istoryaheeee!!!!!!!!!
______________________________________________________
boy: drumer ka miss?
gurl: dli ui….
boy: you make my heart beat kasi…
gurl: ESTORYAHE!!!!
______________________________________________________
guy: pila height nmo miss?
miss: 5’6 rah ue..
guy: dako d.i ka, g.unxa kha nmo pg sulod sa akng kasing2x.
ESTORYAHEEEE!!!!
______________________________________________________
Boy: miss miss dli lageh ni mo agi imong ballpen
Girl: Unsay dli mo agi bah na bag.o pa lageh na nako ggamit
Boy: Tan.awa ragud miss dli gyud agi ang ballpen.. ikaw kunoy butang sa imong number dre sa papel
Girl: ISTORYAHEEEE!
______________________________________________________
guy: rainbow ka miss?…
girl: rainbow? nganu gud tawn?
guy: because you colored my world…
girl: mao ba?.. Estoryaheee…
______________________________________________________
girl: dili jud tika pwede maduwaan
bOY: wow thanks
girl: dili jud tika pwede maduwaan
kay imong kaanyag morag tae..
boy: insultohaaaaa aw estoryaeeee
______________________________________________________
Boy: dili lang naku eh post sa FB nga love tika ha??
Girl: haaa?? nganu man? dili ka ganahan maka hibaw ang kalibutan nga love ko nimu?
Boy: huh? Ikaw raman akong kalibutan….
istoryaaaheeeeeee…… nyahahahaha
______________________________________________________
boy: kabalo ba ka, mura kag password?
girl: y mn?
boy: di tika pwede malimtan..
girl: <gikilig>
boy: pro pwede tka ilisdan..
______________________________________________________
Boy: wala ba ka nabungol or nasabaan?
Girl: wala man…ngano diay?
Boy: sige man gud ug siyagit akong kasingkasing sa imong ngalan…Whahahahha
______________________________________________________
Boy: Bagyo ka ba ??
Girl: Bakit ??
Boy: Kasi the moment you left my area of responsiblity,
u leave my heart in the state of calamity…
toinkS!
______________________________________________________
Girl: 10 years from now amigo pa ba kaha gihapon ta?
boy: dili na
girlnabalaka)huh?ngano man?
boy: asawa naman tika.
estoorryaahee….hehe
______________________________________________________
ako: kahibaw ba ka girl nga mechanical engineer ako gikuha para lang nimo
girl: y man?
ako: kay ugma damlag magtukod kug tulay diha padong sa imong kasing2x..
estoryaheeeeeeeeee
______________________________________________________
BF and GF talking :
BF: babes, 143!
GF: unsa na?
BF: i love you !
GF: wow! 234
BF: huh?! unsa na?
GF: ES TOR YAHE !!!!!!
hahahahaha
______________________________________________________
real meaning of LOVE
L-abis kitang mahal
O-ras oras nasa isip kita
V-ow ako sa ganda mo
E-storyaaaheeee
______________________________________________________
Boy: miss,naa ky map dha??
Girl: wala raba,ngano mn?
Boy: mawala mn gud ko kung magtan.aw ko nmo…
______________________________________________________
BOY: gang, kandila ba ka?
girl: dili, ngano man?
boy: gwapa mn gud kah sa ngitngit, sa ngitngit na lng kah.
girl: dong, kaw kandila ba ka?
boy: dili, ngano pud d i?
girl: huyopon unta tka para mamatay na kang animal kah.
______________________________________________________.
Dili man unta ko WEBSITE
Nganong daghan man ma LINK nako ??
ESTORYAHEEE !!! hahaha
______________________________________________________
Boy: miss … unsai brand sa imong TShirt? pwedeng patan-aw?
Babaye: ha? ahhh! cge!
(Checks tag on back of shirt)
Boy: daan pa ko! Made In Heaven!
______________________________________________________
laki: ms. pwde ko mo agi
bae: nganong d mn dili mani akong kalsada
laki: mananghid ko daan bsn maligsan ko sa imong kgwapa..
______________________________________________________
Boy: miss,naa ky botelya dha??
Girl: wala raba,ngano mn unta??
Boy: nangita mn gd kog kasudlan sakong gugma…….
______________________________________________________
Girl: sir,ngano tab.ang mn ang inyong kape??
Boy: akala ko kasi sapat na ang matatamis mong ngiti……
______________________________________________________
guy: (manuktok sa office o cubicle ba run sa girl…)
muingon ka dayun… mis kita ka ug gwapo ni sulod diri?
gurl: wla man…
guy: mubalik kaha ko ug sulod?
______________________________________________________
Sexy girl nangumpisal. ..
Pari: Iha, unsa may imong sala?
Girl: Father, ug makabati kog lalaki nga mamalikas, di nako mapugngan makig-s*x niya!
Pari: Buang, ka leche gud anang sala-a, peste! Ataya nuh!
______________________________________________________
SalesLady: sir, unsay imo?
Me: (tn-aw s iyang mata) Pwde IKAW
______________________________________________________
boy: mura lage kag alarm clock mis!
girl: karaan nana,kay sa ako ra ga tuyok imo kalibutan?old skul
boy: dili oi,kay circle man gud kag nawng murag annoying orange..wahaha
______________________________________________________
Boy:Uy, mahal!Ingon sa doktor, grabe na jud daw ang akoang sakit sa puso..
Girl: HA?! unsa?! unsa man daw ang gi-ingon sa mga doktor?!
!Boy: Duha ra daw akoang pilion…
….it’s either ICU or you see me.
______________________________________________________
isang BOOK lng ang ndi ko naiintndihan.. un ang…
pagtiBOOK ng puso ko para sa’yo. . . . .♥
______________________________________________________
boy: miss, ketchup ka ba?
girl: unsa naman pud nga ka kornehan?
Boy: gipangita naman gud ka sa akong hotdog 
istoryaheeeeee!!!
______________________________________________________
sa resort
Girl: ganda naman ng view mapa frontview, backview, sideview o topview.
Boy: meron pang isa..
Girl: ano?
Boy: lub view
______________________________________________________
boy: mura jd kag ice tea..
girl: y man?
boy: ang2 buttomless aku kalipay kung mgkoyug ta..
______________________________________________________
BOY: pagkalaagan nalng jud nimo…
GIRL: nganu naksulti man ka ana?
BOY: Naabot man gud ka bsan sa akong damgo…!
______________________________________________________
tisoy: beh, knock-knock
tisay: whos there beh?
tisoy: east
tisay: east who?
tisoy: east who ka diyan…EAST WHO RYAHE!!!!
______________________________________________________
Boy: Mara jud kag Dictionary oi..
Girl: Aii, kahibaw nako ana, ayeee kay akong gitagaan og meaning imo life no?
Boy: Dili!
Girl : Unsa man d i?
Boy: Kay baga man gud kag nawng!!!
Ayeeeehh
______________________________________________________
BOY: asa kah? pwd q mu.borow sah imo calcu?
GIRL: wala raba.
BOY: ako tah i.total f pla na ka.percent akng love nimo
Aguy Estoyaheeee
______________________________________________________
LOLO: pwede iremove tka sa friends list nako sa ako FB?
LOLA: huh? why man?
LOLO: sakit man gud hunahunaon nga friends ra tah.
weeehhhhh….estooorryyyaaahhheeeee…..
______________________________________________________
BOY: miss ang bouncy ng hair mo…
GIRL: i know, thanks ha
BOY: ang bouncy talaga!
BOUNCYNGOT!
______________________________________________________
boy : miss mura jud kag posporo.
girl : ha? nganu gud tawn?
boy : match kay ta.
hahahahaha

Related:


{ 71 comments… read them below or add one }
Brother Break January 11, 2011 at 3:15 am
Hahaha more more please.
John S. January 11, 2011 at 3:22 am
Boy: sege tutuk sa ID sa chix Chix: nganu ka cge tutuk sa akong ID Boy: Kanus-a man ma balhin akong apelyido sa imong ngannn estoryahee! hehe
jane anne baid April 5, 2011 at 4:47 am
hahahaha.,.,nya bobalhin diay nang ngalan naa diay nay tiil?
cheryl April 12, 2011 at 1:27 am
hehehehehhe makal;ingaw gyud na no makahinomdom man pod ta sa atong mga karaan ejejejeje

shacoi January 27, 2011 at 1:28 am

“Ulan”
Ulan nga ngpalangan sa pg-adto ko sa skwelahan,
Ulan nga nipabugnaw sa kahanginan ug ngpamingaw sa kadaghanan;
Ulan nga mkapatapulan nga ang pgligid2x ug pgtulog nlang mahunahunaan,
Ulan nga nibasa sa kabuhatan ug sa unlan diri sa akong kauban;
Dakong katingalahan ky wala man pud unta sa ulan naabtan?
Pirti diay lamia sa iyang tulog nga na laway-lawayan na niya ang iyang unlan.
Pastilan… ULAN…
STORYAHEEEEEEE ULAN!!!
SEE MORE
shacoi.blogspot.com

shacoi January 27, 2011 at 1:30 am

BOY: Miss TAE ba ka???
CHIX: huh?? nganu man??
BOY: Lisud man gud itotok nimu ug dugay… lisud pajud iginhawa basta naa naka..
CHIX: STORYAHEEEE!!!

jhem February 1, 2011 at 5:36 am

boy: a miss cguro pusil ka?
girl: nganu man?
boy: kc da way nga mututuk ku nimu pirmi kung igguh
istoryaheee……….
shai April 22, 2011 at 4:20 pm
wahahah tamah !

jaymar February 1, 2011 at 6:48 am

Boy: a miss cguro shabu ka.
Girl: nganu man?
Boy: unsaun man gud if mulantaw ku nimu pirmi ku ma high.
istoyaheee….

wangbu12345 February 17, 2011 at 9:58 am

boy: baby, tae ka ba?
girl: (galit)yuck! wag ka ngang bastos! hindi ah! bakit? bka ikaw?!
boy: eh kasi di kita kayang paglaruan..
hehehehe..ester!

sherwin February 22, 2011 at 2:03 am

boy: ice cream cAh vAh?
gurl; huh? y man? sweet ra keu cUh?
boy: dili uie lami man gud ka tilaan
gurl: manyak!!!
aCe2ryahEe

sherwin nuñez (bonzky) February 22, 2011 at 2:08 am

Boy: Miss, may alam ka bang sementeryo dito ?
Girl: Oo. meron. Bakit ?
Boy: kasi ipalilibing ko sana ang puso kong patay na patay sa ‘yo !
haha aCe2ryahEe

NIño Jay Bandico February 24, 2011 at 8:02 am

boy: miss unggoy ba ka?
girl: ngano man?
boy: sige man gud kag kapyot sa akong kasingkasing

von bryan satorre March 4, 2011 at 4:00 am

MISIS: Animal kang lalaki ka! Meron akong nabalitaan may kabit kang 18 yrs old!
MISTER: Huli ka na sa balita noh! 23 na siya ngayon!!!! hehehehehhe
wwawawaawwa…estoryahe!!!!

von bryan satorre March 4, 2011 at 4:02 am

Girl: Sabihin mo lang kung in lab kana sa sakin ha? sagutin kita
Boy: Ah talaga? alm mo para kang rebisco
Girl: ha? bakit?
Boy: ang kapal ng filling mo..
hahahahaha

von bryan satorre March 4, 2011 at 4:14 am

Special ang luha kay sa smile
kasi ang smile marami kang taong mangitian
Ang luha tutulo lang yan
kapag may isa kang taong
ayaw mong kalimutan.
estoryahe… ^_^

stephanie March 4, 2011 at 12:09 pm

boy: heart ka bah????
gurl: bakit ?
boy: kasi wala nang natira sa puso ko ehhh……

Steven del Campo March 6, 2011 at 10:28 am

Manny and Dionisia
Dionisia: Manny, lumabas ako kanina para bumili tapos sabi ng mga tambay sa labas pangit daw ako !
Manny: Inay ! Alam mo naman siguro na nasa labas ang tunay na kagandahan di ba ? Kaya wag ka nang labas ng labas !

Steven del Campo March 6, 2011 at 10:34 am

Boy: Layas na sa inyong balay oi ! or kung dili ka, ibaligya nalang to !
Girl: ha ? Ngano man pud daw be ?
Boy: Kay libre naka mupuyo sa akong kasing-kasing !
Istoryaheee !!! :D

Steven del Campo March 6, 2011 at 10:59 am

Boy: Miss, di ba ang heart nasa left ?
Girl: hmm… Oo !
Boy: Eh bakit sa akin nasa iyo ?
Kaila kang Ester ??? Esteryaheee !!! :D :p

charmeigne March 7, 2011 at 4:44 pm

boy:miss energy drink kaba?
grl:sus!esturyahee npud ni padulong.kay ngano?mwla imong kakapoy kung naa ko?
boy:dili!ang emo mangud nawong murag cobra!
hahahaha=)
junrey March 16, 2011 at 4:26 am
ahahha bobo..!
tOnskie March 23, 2011 at 5:50 am
nakakaTAWa 2… I like it.. ESTOOORRRYAAHEEE…
fidel March 30, 2011 at 3:58 pm
aahahahaah ..ang bobo

caster123 March 8, 2011 at 4:39 am

boy:catcher onta ka!
girl:y man!
boy:para ma catch ko nimo kung ma fall in love na ko sa imo
ian_the_killer March 12, 2011 at 5:35 am
istoryahhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Justin March 8, 2011 at 11:38 pm

Boy: Miss manok ka?
Girl: Ha? Ngano man?
Boy: Gusto man gud unta nako nga imong lumluman akong itlog!
Istoryaheee!

Andrea Antonio March 9, 2011 at 12:22 pm

boy: miss apoy kah buh???
girL: y man?
boy: kay ALAB ALAB
“I LOVE YOU”

DreY Enchaii Hitachiie March 9, 2011 at 12:26 pm

boy: tae ka buh??
girL: huh??? bKt??/
boy: Kasi d kitah mapag.Laruan eh..
GirL: Langhiya…ngayon pah ako na.icompara sa tae huh…

DreY Enchaii Hitachiie March 9, 2011 at 12:27 pm

…AFTER A FEW MINUTES..
girL: IHI kah buh??
boy: huh y???
girl: kasi d kitah matiis eh…

ian_the_killer March 12, 2011 at 5:41 am

boy:miss magnet kaba?
girl:y man d i?
boy:layo pa gali ka gimagnet naka sa akong kasing2x

[ÐX]ReÐs0uL March 12, 2011 at 5:44 am

boy:day murag ka pagkaon
girl:huh? ngano man
boy:kay kinaylangan kita sa akong kinabuhi
ESTORYAHE…………^_^

janzgha March 12, 2011 at 6:30 am

boy: san ka ba kagabi?
girl: nasa bahay lang bakit???
boy: wala ka kasi sa panaginip ko eh….
girl: ESTORYAHIIEEEE!!!

istoryahee March 13, 2011 at 5:36 am

Boy: kung mainlab ka!
girl: istoryahee
boy: kung mahigugma ka!
girl: istoryahee
Boy: timani imong gipang sulti
girl:istoryahee

e$$e March 16, 2011 at 12:52 pm

elow po sa nyo lahat may joke po ako…

e$$e March 16, 2011 at 12:55 pm

isang araw papunta kana sana sa paaralan mo may nakita ka sa daanan mo na pera anong gagawin mo pupulotin mo ba o hindi … paki sagut naman yong palusot ko…Thanks God Bless And More Power …Estoyahee imong lolo apila imong lolo …:)

x1boy March 22, 2011 at 3:32 am

boy- miss? pag sa layo noh, mura kag white lady.
girl- huh? nganu?
boy- kay pag makita man gud taka naga boto boto ang ako dughan.
haha! storyaheeee man kayo na uy……..

john louis March 22, 2011 at 9:18 am

GOOD!

tOnskie March 23, 2011 at 5:54 am

Juan ni ad2 sa CLUB..!!!
Guard: dOng. d rabA pwd mAG short..!!!
Juan: Aaahhhhh!!!! sud man gali dAncer gah hubo..!!!
samut na ako ga sHOrt…!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHA!~~!!!!!

hweignnah salas March 24, 2011 at 1:30 pm

vea:chay aha c ariel ?
wenna:na priso chay ..nanu?
vea:huh ? aha dapit?
wenna: sa acung kasing2… :=))
–toryahe–

ana christy andrin March 28, 2011 at 8:57 am

boy: asa na ka kron..?
girl: naa sa amo balay..
boy: muhapit pa ko sa inyo balay o muderetso nako sa imo KASINGKASING..!
3eestooryaheee..!
zhamix March 29, 2011 at 10:47 am
boy: miga pwede nako hulman ang imung shades?? gUrl nag suot og shades: nganU man? Boy: dili naman jod ko ka klaro sa imu tungod sa imung ka gwapa” StorYAhEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ana christy andrin March 28, 2011 at 9:02 am

boy: miss ballpen kaba..?
girl: bakit..?
boy: mabuang man gud kog d ka muagi..!
3storyahe333….

Prince Euthrix March 31, 2011 at 4:09 am

One Day sa School …..
Boie : Miss !!
Gurl : Bakit ?!
Boie : Point Gurad ka bah sa BasketBall team nyu ?!
Gurl : Hindi noh !! Bakit naman ?!
Boie : Kasi .. Ang daling mong naagaw ang Puso ko eh !!
COACH : Huie !! Kilala nyu bah si Estor ?!
Boie & Gurl : Estoryaheeee…..
COACH : Eh , si Tam2x ?!
Boie & Gurl : Tam2x ?!
COACH : Tambagie !! :) )
mhoraia April 6, 2011 at 10:50 am
gurl: kahibaw ka dili tajud ka pwede maduwaan boy: wow thanks gurl: dili taka pwede ma duwaan kay emu kaanyag murag tae! haha :p

dexter castilano April 6, 2011 at 11:45 pm

boy: mora mn ka ug manok ??
girl: bakit naman???
boy: favorite kasi kita
sttoooorrryaaaaheeeeeee

ding'dong-kayexan April 6, 2011 at 11:54 pm

boy: state mo nga name mo
girl: janyra kaye
boy: COMFIRM !!!
-your name has been save to my heart-
heheheheh!!! umphhhh

ding'dong-kayexan April 7, 2011 at 12:00 am

girl: may lahi ka bang puzzle???
boy: ngano man?
girl: kasi simula pa lang kinukumpleto mo na ang araw ko
hehehehehe!!!!! upmh

ej (CHINTOY) April 9, 2011 at 5:37 am

boy: kada tan.aw nako nimo murag way hago.
girl: nganu mn?
boy: imo mn gud nawong murag COBRA
istoooorrryyaahheeeeeeeeee!

jen April 9, 2011 at 3:09 pm

nice jokes..love it..keep up the good work…

ARON April 11, 2011 at 10:44 am

boy: ano ba yan parang isang

domingo millan April 11, 2011 at 10:00 pm

tISOY: miss! Computer kaba??
Tisay: D Y man???
tISOY:Kasi naka SAVE kana sa ISIP KO
ALL: ESTORYAHeEEE

domingo millan April 11, 2011 at 10:03 pm

Easter day ngaYOn !!
Boy: YAY!! :) EASTERN DAY NA !!
GIrL: UU NGA EASTERN DAY NA!!
NANAY: EASTERnyaheeeee

cheryl April 12, 2011 at 1:29 am

hay naku pawa sa duka bha makahinomdom man pod ta sa atong mga ex oi estoryaheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

cheryl April 12, 2011 at 1:34 am

estoryaheeeeeeeeeeeee

patrick obejero April 13, 2011 at 2:26 am

boy: miss para kang refrigerator..
girl: nga no mn?
boy: 2wing makita kata lumalamig ako..
kausapin !!!!!!!
kimzan April 25, 2011 at 6:02 pm
lumalamig!! lumalamig sa imong mata !! estoryahe!! wrong gramar hahah

jesus vic April 16, 2011 at 3:14 am

boy: miss, yello ka ba???
girl: ndi! bkt mo nsabi yan???
boy: ehh sa 2wing katabi kita pinalalamig mo ang puso ko….
Ess2rYaheeee…!!!!!
kholinmolin April 18, 2011 at 1:19 pm
rosa: ka gwapo lagi nimo boy: y mn rosa: gwapo ka u ka sa akon kasing kasing eh istoryaheeeeeeeeeeeee

Mariboy Solis April 17, 2011 at 11:41 am

boy: alam mo para kang test paper…
girl: bakit aman?!
boy: nauubos kasi oras ko sa katititig sa’yo..
weeeeeeeewwwwwwww.. Ace ka.oya

gewaps April 21, 2011 at 2:15 pm

LAKI: Yabz naa kay wallet?
Bae: naa nganu man?
LAKI: kay imu man gud gina dala-dala ako kwarta!!
ESSTORYAHEEEEEE…

gewaps April 21, 2011 at 2:20 pm

boy: Miss, candy ka bah?
girL: huh? nganu candy man daw ku?
boy: kasi ang swEet2 mu kasi ehh
.. ..es2rYahEEE..!

gewaps April 21, 2011 at 2:24 pm

boy: Miss,,pusil ka ba?
girL: nganung ma pusil man daw kuh?
boy: wla pa gani kah nkapabuto sa pusil,,na igonku…
isToryahEe…!!

gewaps April 21, 2011 at 2:27 pm

laki: Miss bulkan ka ba?
bae: Ngano man?
laki: mamula man gud ka,,basta mkakita ku nmu…
esTorYaheE…!

bitobin April 24, 2011 at 2:51 pm

boy: miss baril ka ba?
Girl: ha bakit?
boy: patira nman oh!
nyahaha..

wew April 25, 2011 at 12:20 am

Boy: miss manok ka?
Girl: y man fud?
Boy: kanang lumlumi akung itlog bi??
estoryahee!!!

mistydwan April 26, 2011 at 1:40 pm

boy: day nibalhin naka ug puy anan?
girl: wala oi didto man gihapon ko nagpuyo sa amoa
boy: wee, pag sure oi..
girl: lagi, ngano man diay?
boy: nganong naa man lagi ka dri sa akong kasing kasing..
istoryaheeee…….

Summer Paler April 30, 2011 at 3:54 am

(GF magbabakasyon sa ibang lugar)
BF: Babe, alam mo hindi kita mamimis…
GF: Huh? Ganon?! Bakit naman?
BF: Kasi makakasama kita sa bawat pagtibok nang puso.
Esssseeeey! ACETORYAHEE!

Summer Paler April 30, 2011 at 3:55 am

(GF magbabakasyon sa ibang lugar)
BF: Babe, alam mo hindi kita mamimis…
GF: Huh? Ganon?! Bakit naman?
BF: Kasi makakasama kita sa bawat pagtibok nang puso ko.
Esssseeeey! ACETORYAHEE!

Arnnz nelz April 30, 2011 at 4:53 pm

Boy: miss, hallowblock kaba?
Girl: huh? nganu naka ingun man ka anah?
Boy: gaspang man gud imong nwung
Girl: seminto pud baka?
Boy: hahaha.. nganu man daw beh?!
Girl: Nawung man gud nimu murag gi seminto

John May 1, 2011 at 1:57 pm

Boy: Hon di q na kelangan mag open ng coke
Girl: bakit?
Boy:Bat pa ako mag oopen ng coke ikaw namn ang happiness q!!
Girl: Wee?? Weestroyahee ^_^
NICE Storyaheess.. keep it Up!

Monday, April 25, 2011

Kalayaan : ama ni Walangtutol.

Inangbayan : ang sumimbolo sa bayang Pilipinas.

Dilat na bulag : ang sumimbolo sa espanya.

Bagong Sibol : ang sumimbolo sa amerika.

Masunurin : ang babaeng pilipina.

Tagailog : bidang tauhan, na kumakatawan sa Pilipinong rebolusyonaryo. (rebeldeng tauhan)

Matanglawin : ang gobyerno ng Espanya.

Malaynatin : ang gobyenor Ng Amerika.

Asalhayop : ang mapaglilong tagalog.

HaringBata : ang haring Intsik.

Walangtutol : ang Pilipinong pasibo, at anak ni Inang Bayan.

Halimaw : ang Kastilang pari.



Ang kahapon ngayon at bukas ay nag-papakita di pagsang-ayon ng pagpapalawak ng kapangyrihan na pinamumunuan ng isang bansa sa loob at labas ng kanyang teritoryo at
Naka-pokus ang tagumpay ni InangBayan laban sa mga nangliliit sa kanya. Kasma na dito si Asalhayop na nakipag-sabwatan kay Haringbata upang ipagbigay alam na Sila Tagailog ay maybalak babakahin si Haringbata. Ngunit ng siya ay pawing paalis na ay napigilan siya ni Inangbayan at sinabing dakpin siya dahil ipinagbili ni Asalhayop ang kanilang kalayaan. Sa kanilang narinig ay hinatulan nila si Asalhayop ng kamatayan at nagpatuloy na sumalakay kay Haringbata. Nang sila'y magsilusob ay mutikang mapatay ni haring bata si inag bayan kundi dumating si tagailog at sinaksak siya; nabuwal at namatay si haringbata. Nang namatay si haringbata ay may dumating sina Dilat na bulag at matanglawin na nangnanais na silay iligtas sapgkat mayroong sakuna; di lumaon sila'y na papayag at nag-sumpaan gamit ang kanilang dugo at sabay nila itong ininom.